In 1989, Joanne Palmer left a publishing career in Manhattan and has missed her paycheck ever since. She is a mom, weekly columnist for the Steamboat Pilot & Today, and the owner of a property management company, The House Nanny. Her new book "Life in the 'Boat: How I fell on Warren Miller's skis, cheated on my hairdresser and fought off the Fat Fairy" is now available in local bookstores and online at booklocker.com or amazon.com.

File photo

In 1989, Joanne Palmer left a publishing career in Manhattan and has missed her paycheck ever since. She is a mom, weekly columnist for the Steamboat Pilot & Today, and the owner of a property management company, The House Nanny. Her new book "Life in the 'Boat: How I fell on Warren Miller's skis, cheated on my hairdresser and fought off the Fat Fairy" is now available in local bookstores and online at booklocker.com or amazon.com.

Joanne Palmer: Tweeting Mother Nature

Advertisement

Joanne Palmer

Joanne Palmer's Life in the 'Boat column appears Wednesdays in the Steamboat Today. Email her at jpalmer@springsips.com

Find more columns by Palmer here.

@joannepalmer: Hello, Mother Nature, are you there?

@mothernature: Of course I’m here. I work 365 days a year, 24 hrs a day. What’s up, I just got out of the shower.

@joannepalmer: You’re, um … real?

@mothernature: Well, um … yes … otherwise how could I be tweeting with you?

@joannepalmer: Good point.

@mothernature: I’m about to go into a meeting with Mr. Precipitation, so what’s on your mind?

@joannepalmer: What were you thinking, closing the ski area with high winds two days in the same week?

@mothernature: Maybe I was hoping they’d name another ski run after me … LOL!

@joannepalmer: Seriously?

@mothernature: Sorry, I got carried away. Girls just want to have fun, you know?

@joannepalmer: It was spring break! Busy as Xmas and we had to close!

@mothernature: Well, pardon me. I repeat. I got carried away.

@joannepalmer: I repeat. Knock it off. It was a low snow year anyway and what little we had you blew away.

@mothernature: March madness.

@joannepalmer: That’s basketball.

@mothernature: OK, I will take it up with Mr. Wind at our weekly staff meeting.

@joannepalmer: You have staff meetings?

@mothernature: Yes, and just like any other organization, politics are involved.

@joannepalmer: Oh, that’s sad.

@mothernature: Yes, Wind and Precipitation are engaged in a turf war.

@joannepalmer: Been there, done that.

@mothernature: Having real problems with the performance of Barometric Pressure, but I won’t burden you with that.

@joannepalmer: You operate like a corporation?

@mothernature: Of course. He may not be getting a raise.

@joannepalmer: Ouch!

@mothernature: Back to the wind. Why don’t you invent skis with sails for those windy days?

@joannepalmer: Ah, I don’t think so.

@mothernature: Well, were the downtown businesses happy?

@joannepalmer: Why, yes, they probably were. I saw a lot of visitors carrying shopping bags.

@mothernature: And wasn’t there a lot of hot air blowing around town recently as people argued about Steamboat 700?

@joannepalmer: Actually, yes.

@mothernature: So you see, it’s not just me who blows air.

@joannepalmer: New topic, please!

@mothernature: OK, what are you doing for mud season?

@joannepalmer: In my fantasy life, I’m going to the islands. In reality, I’m staying here.

@mothernature: I see. Anything I can do to help?

@joannepalmer: Yes! Please don’t flood the desert. Keep it warm and dry. No floods!

@mothernature: Anything else?

@joannepalmer: Don’t kill my daffodils.

@mothernature: Got it.

@joannepalmer: How ’bout keeping the April/May snow until next season?

@mothernature: I’ll see what I can do. I may have to take it up with my superiors.

@joannepalmer: Superiors?

@mothernature: I can’t get into details.

@joannepalmer: Have you been affected by the economy?

@mothernature: Why yes! There will be 25 percent fewer hurricanes and 35 percent fewer tornadoes, but 80 percent more cloudy days because full-blown sunny days are really expensive.

@joannepalmer: I like the sun, please don’t take it away.

@mothernature: I can’t go into overtime.

@joannepalmer: Well what about mud season? Can you make clean mud that doesn’t track into the house?

@mothernature: Haha!

@joannepalmer: What about the summer? Can you make the growing season longer so I can grow a tomato?

@mothernature: Haha!

@joannepalmer: Well, you certainly have a good sense of humor.

@mothernature: In my business, it’s essential.

@joannepalmer: Mine too! I’ll tweet with you later. Next time we better stick with the 140 character rule.

@mothernature: Yes, it’s not nice to fool Mother Nature, you know … LOL

@joannepalmer: Tweep!

Comments

Use the comment form below to begin a discussion about this content.

Requires free registration

Posting comments requires a free account and verification.