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Robert Secher was quiet. He stood tall and sat up straight. When asked about girlfriends, Secher would blush, but he would never kiss and tell.

And he loved to draw.

"When he would draw, he would draw military things," said Paula Salky, Secher's sister.

Salky doesn't remember her brother ever wanting to be anything but a Marine. Of course, he also wanted to open a bar in the mountains or somewhere he could sail, but that would wait until his retirement from the Marine Corps.

Salky had suggested Steamboat Springs as his perfect mountain retreat. She knows her brother would have enjoyed the Yampa Valley's scenery and outdoor activities. He certainly would have loved the people here, Salky said.

But there will be no mountain-town bar or visits to Colorado for Robert Secher. The Tennessee Marine was killed in action Oct. 8 in Iraq's Al Anbar province. He was 33.

Losing a brother

Salky's home in Old Town Steamboat Springs smells like chocolate chip cookies. Frank Sinatra plays in the background. Salky needed baked goods and uplifting music to counter her grief.

She got a lift Wednesday, when she returned to Strawberry Park Elementary School, where she is a severe needs aide. A flower arrangement from her co-workers now rests on her coffee table.

"So many people are coming up to say, 'My brother, my son, my uncle' : so many people have relatives overseas," said Salky, who lives in Steamboat with her husband, Randy, and their two daughters, Miranda, 11, and Reina, 9.

Salky was angry when her brother volunteered in January to leave his station in Okinawa, Japan, to train an Iraqi army battalion. Now, Salky wishes her brother were there - that would mean he was still alive.

"He volunteered," Salky said Wednesday. "He signed up. He wanted to be a Marine. He wanted to do his job."

Capt. Secher was assigned to the 3rd Battalion, 12th Marine Regiment, 3rd Marine Division, III Marine Expeditionary Force in Okinawa.

But that's about all Salky and her family know - that and his cause of death, a sniper's bullet to the face during a battle with insurgents. Secher probably felt no pain, his sister said.

The same cannot be said for his family.

Burying a soldier

The Salkys were in Moab, Utah, when word of Paula's brother's death was delivered. The family was told it could be anywhere from 10 days to 10 weeks before Capt. Secher's body would be flown back to the United States.

Fortunately, Salky said, it was the former.

Salky and her family met Capt. Secher's body at the Memphis airport, where he arrived via Marine escort on a Northwest Airlines flight.

"The staff and crew from Northwest Airlines all stopped what they were doing, and everyone in the cargo area stood at attention as the Marines carried his body to the hearse," Salky said. "The Memphis police were all at attention, saluting my brother as we walked to our cars."

The processional drove to the funeral home, and all traffic was stopped along the way, including traffic trying to use the exit and on ramps.

"It was precise, beautiful, almost like slow motion," Salky said. "It was poetry in motion. He was a captain, but I'd like to think they'd do that for everyone."

Marines whom the family had never met were dressed in formal attire. Friends from throughout the world were in Memphis.

Capt. Secher's funeral service was Oct. 15, and Salky's husband and daughters joined her in Memphis.

The funeral was at Temple Israel Sanctuary; the burial was with full honors at West Tennessee Veterans Cemetery. Capt. Secher had requested a local burial rather than one at Arlington National Cemetery.

During the services, the family was reminded that Capt. Secher's first name is Adam in Hebrew. In the Bible, Adam is the world's first man, and the world's population is a descendent of him.

That, Salky said, is how her brother felt about being a Marine. He represented America, fighting on behalf of everyone, for a country and a freedom he felt everyone deserved.

"He had honor, courage, integrity," Salky said. "I feel proud he was my brother. He represented the best of this country."

Care packages

Salky remembers seeing tiny American flag pendants everywhere after the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11. While in Memphis, she went to Walgreens to buy one.

She found one no bigger than a dime. She wears it on the left side of her shirt, near her heart.

"Independence Day, Veterans Day, Memorial Day, we get what that means now," Salky said. "There is a reason."

Salky isn't the only Routt County resident with a relative who has died in Iraq. She isn't the only Steamboat resident with a tie to Operation Iraqi Freedom.

Salky was at a knitting circle months ago when she struck up a conversation with Molly Hibbard. Hibbard's son, Wesley Mottlau, is on his second tour in Iraq. Hibbard, Marci Valicenti and Lynne McNasby have been putting care packages together to send overseas.

When Hibbard heard Salky's story, she added Robert Secher's name to the list. It wasn't long before he received a care package from the Yampa Valley. His sister said it only increased his desire to visit.

"I just thought that was so nice that they included him," Salky said.

Hibbard's son, who is in the Army, returns Nov. 18. The story of Secher's death breaks her heart.

Hibbard vows that she won't stop sending care packages, even after her son returns.

"The soldiers can't wait to get them," Hibbard said. "It's like, 'Somebody cares about me.' It's addressed to him, and they'll open it. It's a free for all."

Popular items include flea collars to fight off sand fleas, wet cloths to wipe sand off computer screens, sports magazines and calling cards.

Hibbard has a long list of other must-have items. What they lack is a list of names of soldiers with local connections.

"We don't have much of a list right now," Valicenti said. "If we could get names, that would be really good. We always wanted to make sure we got people from Routt County, but if you lived in Routt County and had a family member overseas, we want to help."

Residents Ashton and Sheila Palmer have started "Operation Sending Smiles" in anticipation of the holiday season.

Sheila Palmer's nephew was in Iraq for six months. He was injured when his Humvee was blown up, and his lower left leg will likely be amputated.

"I know how much he liked the packages and how much his buddies like them," Sheila Palmer said. "If people personally know someone, I would like to make special packages for people."

It is that type of generosity that helps Salky overcome her grief.

"Every time I climb Howelsen Hill, I'll carry him with me," Salky said about her brother.